Supporting transgender pupils in schools: guidance for education authorities and schools – revised

Working with parents, carers and families

“I had to run away from my parents because they were not happy about who I am. Teachers should know that while parents should respect their child's gender identity, they don't always do so.” Trans young person

The UNCRC explicitly recognises the central role played by parents and families in ensuring that children grow up healthy, happy and safe. It states that:

“the family, as the fundamental group in society and the natural environment for the growth and well- being of all its members and particularly children, should be afforded the necessary protection and assistance so that it can fully assume its responsibilities within the community”

And goes on to recognise:

“that the child, for the full and harmonious development of his or her personality, should grow up in a family environment, in an atmosphere of happiness, love and understanding”^[67].

Evidence shows that young people who have parents who are supportive of their transgender identity are more likely to have good mental health, including improved self- esteem and reduced rates of depression^[68].

Responses to a transgender young person coming out can vary but the majority of parents and carers will want to do what is in the best interests of their child. Of course, some parents and carers may have very legitimate questions about what it means and what will happen next. Others may react negatively because they have inaccurate or incomplete information, or because they are worried about what it will mean for their child and their future. Such reactions often stem from loving and wanting to protect their child.

Parents and carers may have different views from the transgender young person. If this is the case teachers and school staff can assist by creating opportunities for young people to have their views heard and by developing a support plan for the transgender young person in the first instance. Parents and carers may also need additional support to discuss their feelings. For information on sources of support please see page 36.

Whatever the home situation, schools should continue to keep the young person involved in decisions which affect them. This could mean giving the young person the opportunity to voice opinions which differ from their parents and carers. The siblings of transgender young people may also require additional support. They may need space and time to process what is happening, or may be at risk of experiencing bullying from peers. Allowing them an opportunity to talk, and reassuring them that the school is committed to their wellbeing, can be beneficial.

Why support for trans youth matters

Reported life satisfaction

• 72% - Trans youth with supportive parents
• 33% - Trans youth with unsupportive parents

Reported high self-esteem

• 64% - Trans youth with supportive parents
• 13% - Trans youth with unsupportive parents

Described mental health as 'very good' or 'excellent'

• 70% - Trans youth with supportive parents
• 15% - Trans youth with unsupportive parents

Faced housing problems

• 0% - Trans youth with supportive parents
• 55% - Trans youth with unsupportive parents

Suffered depression

• 23% - Trans youth with supportive parents
• 75% - Trans youth with unsupportive parents

Attempted suicide

• 4% - Trans youth with supportive parents
• 57% - Trans youth with unsupportive parents

Based on a 2012 study of 433 individuals. Travers R, Bauer G, Pyne J, Bradley K, for the Trans PULSE Project: Gale L, Papadimitriou M (2012).

Impacts of Strong Parental Support for Trans Youth: a report prepared for Children’s Aid Society of Toronto and Delisle Youth Services. Based on a resource produced by Trans Student Educational Resources: www.transstudent.org

How teachers can help transgender young people and their family relationships

School staff, including teachers can help by:

• working with young people to agree what they need from their parents/carers
• speaking on behalf of a young person who cannot tell their parents/carers what they need
• providing support or referrals for support to alleviate any distress in the home
• providing a safe space for transgender young people to be themselves and have their identities respected

Schools have a welfare responsibility towards young people, and may have to support the young person if decisions need to be made about a young person's wellbeing. Teachers should always provide impartial information and guidance which prioritises a young person's wellbeing.

It is important to recognise the contribution parents/carers can make, and to find solutions by working collaboratively with young people.

Good practice

• If the young person has not told their family, school staff may want to discuss the most likely reaction with the young person. This will allow the teacher and the young person to discuss whether sharing information is in the young person’s best interests, and if so, what information to share and with whom.
• Offer to arrange a meeting with parents or carers; agree this with the young person in advance of the meeting and mutually agree key information to be shared in the discussion and by whom.
• Listen to the concerns of parents and carers without judging them; respond to concerns calmly; and correct any misconceptions.
• The Getting it right for every child approach will keep the young person and parents at the centre of any consideration of wellbeing; and, the identification and agreement of responses and support. Parents and carers may need time to come to terms with what their child has told them. Teachers can help by letting them know about sources of information and support (see below).

If a teacher is concerned about the home environment or the safety of a young person, they should follow the school's child protection policy and procedures for recording and/or acting on such concerns.

Support and referrals for transgender young people

All young people should know where they can go and who they can speak to if they need support.

Schools can help by telling young people (and their families) about support services, for example through posters, websites and social media, and in assemblies, lessons and activities.

There are a range of organisations which provide support and advice to young people about their wellbeing. Schools and education authorities will have local arrangements for the provision of support for health and wellbeing. Organisations such as Childline^[69] can provide a source of advice and information and online support for all young people on their wellbeing.

LGBT Youth Scotland runs youth groups across Scotland^[70] for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender young people aged 13 to 25. This includes specific services for transgender young people in Edinburgh, Glasgow and Dumfries.

LGBT Youth Scotland also provides online support through social media, email and live chat. Here, young people can chat to youth workers about their sexual orientation and/or gender identity, or any other issue. The service is particularly useful for young people in rural areas where there are limited services or for those who are not ready to attend youth groups.

Support and referrals for parents and carers

Agencies that provide advice and support to parents of transgender children include:

• Transparentsees: groups for parents, carers and other family members of trans people: Home | TransparenTsees
• Mermaids: a UK-wide organisation which works to reduce isolation and loneliness for parents and young people dealing with gender issues and to empower families and young people: www.mermaidsuk.org.uk, support line : 0808 801 0400