Growing up in Scotland: a study following the lives of Scotland's children

The first research report on Sweep 1 findings of the Growing Up in Scotland study.


Chapter 7: Parenting Styles and Parenting Responsibilities

7.1 Introduction

Social scientists have long debated the cause and consequences of different parenting styles for children. This chapter reports attitudes to a number of aspects of parenting including the value of expert knowledge. While expert knowledge indicating good and bad ways of parenting has entered popular culture and informs a number of parenting programmes, it may be helpful to know more about how widely the interviewed parent, predominantly mothers, accept the idea of learning from experts. Questions asked of parents included an item on their attitude to smacking which has been a matter of particular public and policy debate. Data on parenting styles are also reported. Parenting styles were explored through questions about the activities and resources parents use in interaction with their children. Variations in parenting styles are not, of course, reducible to good and bad parenting, and agreement is lacking, even among experts, about many aspects of parenting. Some researchers have suggested that dominant understandings of 'good parenting' typically gloss over the impact of socio-economic circumstances on differences in the amounts of time, energy and material resources mothers have for 'sensitive' or 'attentive' mothering and shape the lessons that they communicate to children (Gillies, 2005, Walkerdine and Lucey, 1989). Walkerdine and Lucey (1989, 115), have argued, for example, that if a working-class mother is more likely than a middle-class mother to simply say no to a child demanding their attention, this reflects the class-specificity of learning 'you cannot always have what you want when you want it' rather than a lack of understanding of good parenting techniques.

The chapter then ends with discussion of gendered divisions of labour. Couple households offer the possibility of a division of labour around child care and household chores, and gendered divisions of labour may in turn interact with styles of parenting.

7.2 Attitudes towards parenting

Parents were asked a variety of attitudinal questions about family life and being a parent, different parenting techniques, and asking for help or advice about parenting. Respondents were asked whether they agreed or disagreed with each statement using a five-point scale (from 'agree strongly' to 'disagree strongly'). Summarised responses by sample type are detailed in Table 7.1.

Table 7.1 Attitudes towards parenting by sample type

Attitude/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

Nobody can teach you how to be a good parent, you just have to learn for yourself

Agree strongly/agree

62.6

60.4

Neither agree nor disagree

15.4

14.9

Disagree strongly/disagree

22.0

24.7

It's more important to go with what the child wants or needs than to stick to a firm routine for feeding or sleeping

Agree strongly/agree

35.2

24.4

Neither agree nor disagree

18.8

17.2

Disagree strongly/disagree

45.8

58.4

It's better for children to have two parents than one

Agree strongly/agree

59.3

56.4

Neither agree nor disagree

20.6

21.3

Disagree strongly/disagree

19.9

22.1

If you ask for help or advice on parenting from professionals like doctors or social workers, they start taking over

Agree strongly/agree

9.4

10.1

Neither agree nor disagree

24.2

24.1

Disagree strongly/disagree

66.3

63.8

It's difficult to ask people for help or advice unless you know them really well

Agree strongly/agree

25.2

26.9

Neither agree nor disagree

12.1

13.5

Disagree strongly/disagree

62.6

59.5

It's hard to know who to ask for help or advice about being a parent

Agree strongly/agree

22.2

24.4

Neither agree nor disagree

14.2

15.6

Disagree strongly/disagree

63.6

59.6

It may not be a good thing to smack, but sometimes it is the only thing that will work

Agree strongly/agree

30.0

41.7

Neither agree nor disagree

20.9

18.8

Disagree strongly/disagree

49.1

39.6

Bases

Weighted

5217

2858

Unweighted

5217

2858

Attitude 1: Nobody can teach you how to be a good parent, you just have to learn for yourself

Overall, there was a high level of agreement with this statement across both the baby and toddler cohorts with around 60% of parents agreeing or strongly agreeing.

Lone parents were considerably more likely than parents in couple families to agree with the statement (78% compared with 59%) as were younger mothers compared with older mothers (Figure 7-A). In the baby cohort, almost nine in ten (88%) mothers under the age of 20 agreed with the statement compared with less than half of mothers aged 40 or older (44%).

Figure 7-A Percentage strongly agree/agree with statement: 'Nobody can teach you how to be a good parent, you just have to learn for yourself' by age of mother at birth of cohort child

image of Figure 7-A Percentage strongly agree/agree with statement: 'Nobody can teach you how to be a good parent, you just have to learn for yourself' by age of mother at birth of cohort child

Attitude 2: It's more important to go with what the child wants or needs than to stick to a firm routine for feeding or sleeping

Overall, both baby and toddler parents tended to disagree with this statement indicating they were more in favour of following a routine with their children than being entirely child-led. Toddler parents were more strongly in favour of following a routine than were parents of babies (46% and 58% respectively disagreed).

There was a direct relationship between income and propensity to agree with the statement, with those in lowest income quartile in both cohorts more likely to agree than parents in the higher income quartiles (Figure 7-B).

Figure 7-B Percentage strongly agreeing/agreeing with statement: 'It's more important to go with what the child wants or needs than to stick to a firm routine for feeding or sleeping' by household income quartile

image of Figure 7-B Percentage strongly agreeing/agreeing with statement: 'It's more important to go with what the child wants or needs than to stick to a firm routine for feeding or sleeping' by household income quartile

Attitude 3: It's better for children to have two parents than one

In general, most parents agreed with this statement. Not surprisingly, however, lone parents were far more likely than those in couple households to disagree (41% versus 15% respectively). Interestingly though, two-fifths of lone parents still felt it was better for children to have two parents.

There were also some clear differences in response to this question by ethnicity. Respondents from non-white backgrounds were considerably more likely than those from white backgrounds to agree with this statement (83% versus 58% respectively).

Table 7.2 Percentage agreeing or disagreeing with statement 'It's better for children to have two parents than one' by sample and family type

Activity type/Response

Sample and Family Type

Baby

Toddler

Lone parent

Couple family

Lone parent

Couple family

Agree strongly

9.6

25.9

7.5

24.5

Agree

30.8

38.3

29.8

38.3

Neither agree nor disagree

18.6

21.2

18.7

22.2

Disagree

33.2

13.2

35.6

13.6

Disagree strongly

7.8

1.4

8.5

1.5

Bases

Weighted

1054

4156

699

2154

Unweighted

973

4237

653

2200

Attitude 4: If you ask for help or advice on parenting from professionals like doctors or social workers, they start taking over

The majority of parents, around two-thirds for each sample, disagreed with this statement. However, younger parents, particularly those under the age of 20, were more likely to agree reflecting a possible wariness of professional intervention among this group. Around one-fifth of the youngest mothers agreed with the statement compared with just 5% of mothers in their thirties (Figure 7-C). Parents from non-white backgrounds were also slightly more likely to agree and less likely to disagree with the statement than were those from white backgrounds. In the baby cohort, 14% of parents from non-white backgrounds agreed with the statement compared with 9% of parents from white backgrounds.

Figure 7-C Percentage strongly agreeing/agreeing with statement: 'If you ask for help or advice on parenting from professionals like doctors or social workers, they start taking over' by age of mother at birth of cohort child

image of Figure 7-C Percentage strongly agreeing/agreeing with statement: 'If you ask for help or advice on parenting from professionals like doctors or social workers, they start taking over' by age of mother at birth of cohort child

Attitude 5: It's difficult to ask people for help or advice unless you know them really well

Broadly speaking, parents in both sample groups disagreed with this statement. Again, some key distinctions by age are evident in the responses suggesting that younger mothers found it more difficult to ask for advice from people they did not know well than did older mothers (Figure 7-D).

Agreement with the statement was also directly correlated with household income. Parents in the highest income quartile (14%) were substantially less likely than those in the lowest income quartile (38%) to agree. There was also a clear pattern by ethnicity - 44% of non-white mothers agreed with the statement compared with 24% of white mothers.

Figure 7-D Percentage strongly agreeing/agreeing with statement: 'It's difficult to ask people for help or advice unless you know them really well' by age of mother at birth of cohort child (baby sample only)

image of Figure 7-D Percentage strongly agreeing/agreeing with statement: 'It's difficult to ask people for help or advice unless you know them really well' by age of mother at birth of cohort child (baby sample only)

Attitude 6 It's hard to know who to ask for help or advice about being a parent

The pattern of response to this statement was very similar for answers to the previous statement in that most parents tended to disagree and there were matching patterns evident across the various sub-groups. Interestingly, however, the level of disagreement was a little less pronounced suggesting that parents find the process of identifying an appropriate person to seek help or advice from easier than actually asking someone for help or advice.

Attitude 7: It may not be a good thing to smack, but sometimes it is the only thing that will work

A minority of parents in both cohorts agreed with this statement, though there was some difference between the two samples - 30% of respondents in the baby cohort agreed compared with 42% of toddler parents. There was a direct relationship, in both samples, between the age of the mother and agreement with the statement - older mothers were more likely to agree than younger mothers. For example, in the baby sample 18% of mothers aged under 20 at the time of the child's birth agreed with the statement compared with 31% of mothers aged 40 or older at the time of the child's birth.

Level of agreement also increased with the number of children in the family. As the data in Figure 7-E indicates, for the baby cohort, respondents in households with four or more children were twice as likely as those in single child households to say they agreed.

Figure 7-E Percentage strongly agreeing/agreeing with statement: 'It may not be a good thing to smack, but sometimes it is the only thing that will work' by number of children in the household

image of Figure 7-E Percentage strongly agreeing/agreeing with statement: 'It may not be a good thing to smack, but sometimes it is the only thing that will work' by number of children in the household

7.3 Activities with the child

Respondents were asked about the type of activities their child participated in and how regularly they did so. We were interested in the opportunities available for cohort children to engage in family activities, educational play with their parents and the range of educational stimuli around them. Children in the toddler cohort were asked about a wider range of activities than those in the baby cohort. Indication is made in the text where the sample has been restricted in this manner.

7.3.1 Family activities

Parents were asked about a range of activities which were family-oriented and which in many cases would involve the participation of siblings or other family members. The results for these activities are detailed in Table 7.3. Note only one of these activities - indoor and outdoor games - was asked of the baby cohort as well as the toddler cohort.

How often does childname eat with you and other family members?

The overwhelming majority (96%) of families ate together everyday or most days and almost all of the remainder did so at least once or twice a week. There was no discernible difference in the characteristics of those families who ate together every or most days and those who did not.

How often do you or your partner take childname to the park or playground?

There was a high level of use of parks and playgrounds with 90% of the toddler sample visiting once a fortnight or more often and the majority (60%) going once or twice a week. As might be expected, parents of only children reported going to the park more frequently. Interestingly, there was little difference in frequency of visits to the park between parents living in urban and rural areas.

Table 7.3 Frequency of family activities by sample type

Activity type/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

How often does childname eat with you and other family members?

Everyday/most days

-

95.9

Once or twice a week

-

3.0

Once a fortnight

-

0.4

Less often than once a fortnight

-

0.7

How often do you or your partner take childname to the park or playground?

Everyday/most days

-

17.8

Once or twice a week

-

59.9

Once a fortnight

-

12.5

Less often than once a fortnight

-

9.8

How often do you or your partner take childname to visit friends who have small children?

Everyday/most days

-

15.6

Once or twice a week

-

47.0

Once a fortnight

-

15.6

Less often than once a fortnight

-

21.8

How often do you or your partner play indoor or outdoor games with childname?

Everyday/most days

94.2

89.2

Once or twice a week

4.5

9.0

Once a fortnight

0.3

.6

Less often than once a fortnight

1.0

1.2

Did you do anything special for childname on his/her last birthday?

Yes

-

98.2

No

-

1.8

Bases

Weighted

5217

2858

Unweighted

5217

2858

How often do you or your partner take childname to visit friends who have small children?

Although most parents took their child visiting on a fairly regular basis - around four out of five did so fortnightly or more often - lone parents made visits more often than parents in couple families. Parents in lower income households were less likely to make any visits than those in higher income households were (11% 'never' compared with 2% of those in higher income households) but those who did were more likely to do so frequently (Everyday/most days: 23% in lowest income quartile versus 7% in highest income quartile). More regular visits were also directly related to the age of mother with the youngest mothers making the most frequent visits to other homes with young children.

How often do you or your partner play indoor or outdoor games with childname?

Given the broad range of possible activities covered by this question it is not surprising that around nine in ten parents from each sample said they did this with their child everyday or most days (94% babies, 89% toddlers). The remaining parents did so around once or twice a week. There were no notable differences in this activity across sub-groups.

7.3.2 Educational activities

In addition to questions about family-oriented activities, parents were also asked how often they undertook a range of home educational activities with their child and about the number of children's books in their home.

Table 7.4 Number of books in household and frequency of looking at books or reading stories to child by sample type

Activity type/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

About how many children's books do you have in your home at the moment, including library books, that are aimed at children under 5?

More than 30

32.5

57.7

21 to 30

14.3

18.4

11 to 20

24.3

14.7

10 or less

28.8

9.1

How often do you or your partner look at books with childname or read stories with him/her?

Everyday/most days

65.9

84.2

Once or twice a week

20.9

12.1

Once a fortnight

3.4

1.3

Less often than once a fortnight

9.8

2.4

Bases

Weighted

5217

2858

Unweighted

5217

2858

Respondents in higher income households and those with higher educational attainment had access to more of this type of resource than those in lower income households and with lower educational attainment. Forty percent of households in the lowest income quartile had less than ten children's books compared with 18% in the highest income quartile. Around two-fifths of (44%) households where the mother had no qualifications had less than ten children's books compared with 17% of households where the mother held a university degree.

Looking at books and reading stories with children was a frequent activity in both cohorts - 84% of toddler parents looked at books or read stories with their child everyday or most days compared with 66% of baby parents. Although, for the most part, all parents undertook this activity reasonably regularly, some variations were evident between groups, particularly within the baby sample. For example, in the baby cohort, 80% of mothers aged under 20 looked at books or stories with their child at least once or twice a week or more often, compared with 88% of mothers aged 40 or over. Three-quarters (76%) of baby parents in the highest income group reported reading to their child everyday or most days compared with 57% of parents in the lowest income group. Parents from non-white backgrounds read stories or looked at books less frequently than parents from white backgrounds, though base sizes are small here. In the toddler sample, 85% of white parents read stories with their child most days compared with 62% of non-white parents.

Toddlers' parents were asked how often their child looked at picture books outside of nursery. Only a very small proportion of parents (3%) reported that this never happened (see Figure 7-F). Seven out of ten parents of toddlers (69%) reported that their child looked at picture books everyday, 15% three to six times a week and 13% once or twice a week. There were, however, some clear differences across subgroups. For example, four out of five (81%) mothers who held a degree level qualification said their child looked at books outside of nursery everyday compared with 60% of children with mothers who held standard grade level qualifications and 50% of children whose mothers had no qualifications.

Figure 7-F Frequency with which child looked at picture books outside of nursery by highest maternal educational qualification

image of Figure 7-F Frequency with which child looked at picture books outside of nursery by highest maternal educational qualification

Table 7.5 Frequency of visiting the library by sample type

Activity type/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

How often do you or your partner take childname to the library?

Everyday/most days

0.3

0.3

Once or twice a week

4.0

6.1

Once a fortnight

5.3

11.8

Less often than once a fortnight

15.1

26.7

Never

75.3

55.1

Bases

Weighted

5217

2858

Unweighted

5217

2858

Given the age of the children in the sample, it is not surprising that visiting the library was not a regular activity for children in either cohort. Three-quarters of baby parents and over half (55%) of toddler parents said they never took the cohort child to the library. Lone parent families were even less likely to use the library than couple families. Among the toddler sample, 66% of lone parents reported that they never used the library compared with 52% of parents in couple families. Library visiting was also related to the age of the child's mother with younger mothers being less likely to visit the library than older mothers. There was also a strong relationship between visiting the library and mothers' level of education. Mothers with degrees were significantly more likely to take their child to the library than mothers with lower qualifications.

Table 7.6 Frequency of painting and drawing with child by sample type

Activity type/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

How often do you or your partner paint or draw together with childname

Everyday/most days

-

43.7

Once or twice a week

-

40.3

Once a fortnight

-

8.5

Less often than once a fortnight

-

3.9

Never

-

3.6

Bases

Weighted

-

2858

Unweighted

-

2858

Only a very small proportion of toddlers' parents said they never painted or drew together with their child (4%) and the vast majority (84%) said they did so at least once or twice a week. Mothers with no qualifications were significantly more likely to report that they never painted with their child: 12% of mothers with no qualifications never did this compared with only 3% of mothers with Higher grades or equivalent.

Table 7.7 Frequency of reciting nursery rhymes and singing songs with child by sample type

Activity type/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

How often do you or your partner recite nursery rhymes or sing songs with childname?

Everyday/most days

89.9

84.1

Once or twice a week

7.4

11.8

Once a fortnight

0.7

1.6

Less often than once a fortnight

0.6

1.3

Never

1.4

1.2

Bases

Weighted

5217

2858

Unweighted

5217

2858

The vast majority of parents said that they recited rhymes or sang songs with their child at least once or twice a week and a very large proportion did so every day or most days (90% of baby cohort and 84% of toddler cohort). There was a slight difference by age of mother at birth - 80% of mothers aged under 20 said they recited nursery rhymes with/to their child every day or most days compared with 90% of mothers in all other age groups.

Table 7.8 Frequency of letter, number and shape recognition activities with child by sample type

Activity type/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

How often do you or your partner ever play at recognising letters, words, numbers or shapes with childname?

Everyday/most days

-

63.3

Once or twice a week

-

26.9

Once a fortnight

-

3.9

Less often than once a fortnight

-

2.1

Never

-

3.8

Bases

Weighted

-

2858

Unweighted

-

2858

Toddlers' parents were asked how often they played at recognising letters, numbers and shapes with the cohort child. Again, this was a common activity, only 4% said they never did this and almost two-thirds were doing it everyday or most days.

Table 7.9 Frequency of using a computer with child by sample type

Activity type/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

How often do you or your partner use a computer with childname for example to play games, draw, or look for information?

Everyday/most days

-

8.5

Once or twice a week

-

22.0

Once a fortnight

-

10.6

Less often than once a fortnight

-

13.8

Never

-

45.1

Bases

Weighted

-

2858

Unweighted

-

2858

Computer use was found to be the least common parent-child activity. Almost half (45%) of toddlers' parents said they never did this with their child and those who did, did so on a fairly infrequent basis. Lone parents were significantly less likely than parents in couple families to ever use a computer with their child - 60% of single parents said they never did this compared with 40% of parents in couple families. Computer-related activities with the child were more common in high-income households than lower-income households. Around two-thirds of parents (67%) in the highest income quartile said they did this at least sometimes compared with 43% of parents in the lowest income quartile. Differences by mother's education level were perhaps even starker - 70% of mothers without qualifications never used a computer with their child compared with 33% of mothers who were degree educated.

7.4 Television and other audio or visual media

Watching television was a far more common activity for toddlers than for babies. Almost half (47%) of the baby cohort had watched no television in the week preceding the survey compared with just 5% of children in the toddler cohort. In those households in which the child had watched television, four out of five toddler (81%) parents said their child had watched television for more than 10 minutes or more on each of the seven days in the past week (see Figure 7-G).

There were some key differences by subgroup within the baby sample. For example, watching television in the baby cohort was directly related to the age of the mother. Children with younger mothers were more likely than children with older mothers to watch television and to watch it more often. Thirty-four percent of mothers aged under 20 said their child had not watched television in the last week while 46% said their child had watched everyday in the last week. The corresponding figures for mothers aged 40 or over were 52% and 30%. Babies in lone parent families were also more likely to have watched television in the last week and to have watched it more often than babies in couple families. Forty-four percent of babies in lone parent families had watched television on seven days in the last week compared with 32% of babies in couple families. A little over two-fifths of babies (44%) from households in the lowest income quartile watched television everyday in the week before the interview compared with a quarter of babies in families in the highest income group.

Figure 7-G Number of days in the last week on which child had watched television for 10 or more minutes at a time by age of mother at birth of cohort child (baby cohort only)

image of Figure 7-G Number of days in the last week on which child had watched television for 10 or more minutes at a time by age of mother at birth of cohort child (baby cohort only)

Parents who said their children watched television were asked who their child usually watched television with - a parent or other adult, another child or on their own. Sixteen percent of children in the baby cohort and 20% of toddlers only ever watched television on their own. Seventy percent of parents in the baby sample and 60% in the toddler sample said that a parent or other adult watched television with the cohort child at least some of the time. Toddlers, given their greater likelihood to be in multiple child households, were twice as likely as babies to watch television with other children.

Across both cohorts, children in lone parent families, lower income households and those with mothers aged under 30 were more likely to only ever watch television on their own. A fifth of (21%) babies in lone parent families only watched television on their own compared with 14% of babies in couple families.

Table 7.10 Number of children's audio and audio-visual recordings in household by sample type

Activity type/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

About how many children's records, audio tapes or CDs do you have in your home at the moment, including any from the library, that are aimed at children under 5?

More than 30

3.7

6.7

21 to 30

3.2

5.9

11 to 20

11.8

18.8

1 to 10

60.6

58.9

None

20.7

9.7

About how many children's videos or dvds do you have in your home at the moment, including any from the library, that are aimed at children under 5?

More than 30

18.2

31.9

21 to 30

9.8

18.3

11 to 20

16.2

26.5

1 to 10

39.0

22.4

None

16.8

0.9

Bases

Weighted

5217

2858

Unweighted

5217

2858

Ownership of children's books in baby households was much higher than ownership of either children's tapes or CDs, children's videos or DVDs whereas children in toddler households were just as likely to have access to videos or DVDs as they were to books. Less than 1% of toddler households had no children's videos or DVDs, a similar proportion had no children's books.

Having no children's videos or DVDs in the home was directly related to the mother's level of education. Around one-fifth (21%) of mothers with degrees had no children's videos or DVDs in the house compared with 14% mothers with no qualifications. Ownership of tapes and CDs however, followed the opposite pattern. Children whose mothers were degree educated were more likely to have access to tapes and CDs than those whose mothers had no qualifications (89% for degree education compared with 63% for no qualifications).

7.5 Household division of labour

Respondents living with a partner were asked how they divided tasks related to the cohort child and also household chores more generally. The child-related responsibilities asked about included generally looking after and feeding the child, changing nappies, looking after the child when he or she was ill and getting up to comfort the child at night. The household chores examined were cleaning, laundry and the preparation of meals. Results for the child-related tasks are detailed in Table 7.11, while those for the household tasks are in Table 7.12.

7.5.1 Child-related responsibilities

Table 7.11 Responsibility for child-related task by sample type

Task/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

Feeding him/her

I do most of it

79.5

76.1

My husband/wife/partner does most of it

1.9

3.5

We share more or less equally

17.8

18.9

Someone else does it

<1

1.5

Changing his/her nappies

I do most of it

66.7

65.4

My husband/wife/partner does most of it

2.2

2.6

We share more or less equally

30.4

28.9

Someone else does it

<1

1.0

Getting up in the night if he/she cries or needs to be comforted

I do most of it

58.2

53.0

My husband/wife/partner does most of it

7.7

10.6

We share more or less equally

34.0

36.1

Someone else does it

<1

<1

Looking after the child when he/she is ill

I do most of it

62.8

66.2

My husband/wife/partner does most of it

1.6

1.8

We share more or less equally

35.5

31.7

Someone else does it

<1

<1

Generally being with and looking after the child

I do most of it

70.1

69.5

My husband/wife/partner does most of it

1.5

2.0

We share more or less equally

27.8

27.4

Someone else does it

<1

1.1

Given that, in the vast majority (99%) of cases, the respondent was the child's mother, the data indicate that most child-related work was undertaken by the mother. This pattern was clearest in relation to 'feeding the child' and 'generally being with the child'. This situation applied regardless of whether the mother was working full or part-time although tasks were more likely to be shared between partners in households where the mother was working. For example, in 47% of couple households in the baby cohort where the mother was employed full-time, respondents reported that they shared 'generally being with the child' more or less equally compared with 29% in households where the mother worked part-time and 17% in households where the mother did not work. However, 47% of mothers working full-time still reported that they did most of this task themselves.

There were few significant differences in the balance of child-related responsibilities across the sample with the mother undertaking the majority of tasks within most groups. However, data from the baby cohort demonstrate some differences by household income and mother's age. For example, tasks were more likely to be shared in higher income households than in lower income households, and mothers in the youngest age group were significantly less likely to be undertaking the tasks on their own.

7.5.2 Household responsibilities

Table 7.12 Responsibility for household tasks by sample type

Task/Response

Sample type

Baby

Toddler

Preparing and cooking the main meal

I do most of it

67.0

70.6

My husband/wife/partner does most of it

12.6

10.4

We share more or less equally

19.5

18.0

Someone else does it

<1

1.0

Cleaning the home

I do most of it

70.1

74.4

My husband/wife/partner does most of it

3.4

2.4

We share more or less equally

23.8

20.3

Someone else does it

2.7

2.8

Laundry and ironing

I do most of it

76.2

79.5

My husband/wife/partner does most of it

3.6

2.8

We share more or less equally

18.1

15.7

Someone else does it

2.1

2.0

Bases

Weighted

5217

2858

Unweighted

5217

2858

Mothers again tended to assume most responsibility for these household tasks - especially for laundry and ironing where around three-quarters of baby respondents (76%) and four-fifths of toddler respondents (80%) reported that they did most of this themselves.

In relationships where only one parent was working full-time, the partner remaining at home, irrespective of gender, took on the majority of the household tasks. In families where both parents were working over 16 hours a week, mothers still took on the majority of household tasks although there was a greater degree of sharing tasks than in households where only one parent worked (Figure 7-H). The balance of responsibility did not vary significantly by household NS-SEC or deprivation level. However, as with the child-related responsibilities, mothers in the youngest age group were more likely to be sharing household tasks than older mothers.

Figure 7-H Responsibility for laundry and ironing by household employment - couple families (baby cohort only)

image of Figure 7-H Responsibility for laundry and ironing by household employment - couple families (baby cohort only)

These analyses suggest a slightly more equitable division of labour in terms of child-related tasks than of broader housework. Overall, in both samples around 30% of couple families shared child care duties such as looking after the child, changing nappies, getting up in the night and looking after the child if he or she was ill. This compared with around 20% for domestic tasks such as cleaning the house, preparing meals and laundry and ironing.

7.6 Key points

  • Responses to the statements on parenting issues demonstrated a distinct set of attitudes among younger mothers who were generally more wary of professional sources of parenting support and less confident in identifying and seeking help and advice about parenting than older mothers were.
  • Most parents took their child to visit friends with small children on a fairly regular basis. Among those who did so, this was a more frequent activity for younger respondents and those in lower income households.
  • The majority of children in both cohorts had access to children's books and reading to, or with, the child was a common activity among most families in the study. However, respondents with fewer or no educational qualifications, younger respondents and those from low income households had fewer books and read with their child less often.
  • Mothers with lower level or no educational qualifications also undertook other educational-related activities with their child on a less frequent basis than those with higher qualifications.
  • Children in lone parent households, those in lower income households and those with younger mothers watched television more often and more likely to be watching it on their own than children in couple families, higher income households and those with older mothers.
  • A clear gender bias emerged in the household division of labour across both child-related and broader household tasks. For both sets of tasks, the child's mother was predominantly responsible for all tasks irrespective of employment status, household income and socio-economic classification. Note that this finding may reflect the particular nature of the tasks which were included.

7.7 Conclusion

While the majority of parents are sceptical about the possibility of somebody teaching them the art of being a good parent, it is clear that suspicion of professional experts varies by age, education and socio-economic circumstances, and is highest among young parents. There are a number of possible interpretations of this finding and further research would be required to fully explore the issue. It is not possible to know, for example, whether the young largely working-class parents have experience of being patronised and 'taken over' or feel stigmatised by being the target for remedial education. Whatever the explanation, it is clear that a wide roll-out of programmes directed at parents such as parenting classes might be met with particular suspicion by this group, although the very small proportion of parents who have experienced parenting classes were positive about them.

Like much previous research, the data show that the use of resources and activities by parents is structured by differences in education and socio-economic circumstances. For example, less affluent children have fewer books and watch more television and the most educated parents spend the most time with children in activities generally regarded as having a high educational value. Differences in attitudes to smacking did not emerge as being so systematically related to socioeconomic circumstances. Less than half of parents accepted smacking as 'sometimes the only thing that will work' but level of acceptance was associated with the number of children in the family more than any other variable. The data also show that gendered divisions of labour persist in the majority of family households despite coinciding with universal pursuit of gender equality as the ideal. This makes 'life work balance' a very different issue for men and women, a factor that will continue to shape both sexes orientations to policies intended to assist working parents balance their paid employment and family life.

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